am i a bad person ?!
18Dec10
Some people seem to think so. Or maybe not a bad person… But a selfish person… perhaps that is true. That’s not a very nice to hear from someone close to you that you really care about – and what is the answer to something like that? I did not have any… “I’m sorry” is just really good for nothing. I did fuck up. I am fucked up… apparently.. Fuck. // S
Held The Hand by Mayer Hawthorne // all pic’s = unknown. 
Filed under: "iam,youare,he/she/itis", friends, love, music, nature, text, thoughts | 5 Comments
. . . ? ! 
Why? People think I am a bad guy too. I drink. So I am bad. But I am not selfish. If I can help a person I love it.
I’m sorry people think youre a bad guy? I don’t see myself as selfish either… but i don’t know. Some times I just don’t think – and it can seem selfish.
It’s good to be selfish sometimes. It’s natural. But it also feels good to help others. The thrill in helping others is to see that happy smile on peoples faces. You make friends. You aren’t lonely.
But some habits give a bad impression. Like drinking.
Why? People are right. Drinkers look weird to people. People look weird to drinkers. No understanding. Drinkers become bad. You drink?
Yes sometimes you have to think of yourself. But I also enjoy to please others and make them happy. The post was acctually very specific – It’s not something I get told often. You talk alot about drinking, and how bad it is. None of my problems come from drinking.
It’s not bad. It’s not good. I have lost all my girl friends because of drinking. They also forgive me. I drink because I am bored.
I fought with my girlfriends deliberately- knowingly- to TEST them. Many failed. Some are trure. Sadly- they are all married. They realise what a lousy nice guy I was. Now I lost faith in love. I only like to Fu–k. The best addiction. But I love women. I try to act tough. but I can’t. We end up as loving friends. but I am scared of love. i like fu..k only. Scared of feelings.